New Voice Mail Message

I used Text-To-Speech software to update the voice mail message on my mobile phone. It doesn't sound as clear when recording into my phone off of PC speakers, but it'll suffice.

This is the exact text I wrote so the female computer voice could pronounce everything, including my name:

This is the automatic voice messaging system for Billy know. If you are calling for alimony payments, please hang up and text message the phrase. I want my money dead beat. Followed by the (United States) dollar amount to this mobile number now. If you are calling to report an emergency, please hang up and text message the state of your emergency in the form of a Japanese "hai ku" to this mobile number now. To leave a voice message for mister know, please stay on the line and wait for the tone.

I was going to add a part about regarding calls that are "Sexual in nature," but it seemed like a long message already.